Whenever there is a behaviour that no matter how hard we try, we feel that we can’t stop, it is always meeting an unconscious need or has an unconscious side benefit.
Whenever we continue repeating a behaviour, especially when we know it is not serving us on any level, it is because of the unconscious needs that this behaviour provides for us in some way, shape or form.
The challenge with these types of behaviours especially when we know they are bad or harmful to ourself and or others, they also can become a huge driver of guilt or shame.
This can in fact add to and further drive the addictive pattern or behaviour.
Becoming conscious of what has been driving you unconsciously is paramount for changing unresourceful behaviours.
And deeper than that, understanding what your unmet needs are, that you continue to try to meet through this behaviour is exactly what is needed in order to heal yourself and create change with this behaviour.
Otherwise you will continue to fight with yourself, continuing to then feel like a failure, or feel that you should have more will power, or should be better in some way. (Guilting and shaming ourself further.)
Below are some powerful journaling questions that you can ask yourself….
What do I get from this behaviour?
What don’t I have to do because of this behaviour?
What don’t I have to be responsible for?
Understanding your deeper needs and healing yourself is exactly what we dive deep into in my Thrive Program.
Because so much of what drives burnout comes from the addictive pattern of not being able to say no. Of continuing to feel like you have to be doing everything for everybody else, otherwise you feel worthless, devalued or not needed.
Of caring so deeply about how others feel, that you continue to put your own needs last. However, this is so damaging to you and often at the core, is a deep wound of not feeling enough, or not feeling that you will be loved if you stop doing this.
It can create incredible fear, guilt and shame to say no and to create healthy boundaries.
And that’s what has people continuing these cycles and behaviours, until their body finally says no and it stops them in their tracks.
Don’t let yourself get to that point.
Drinking, smoking, emotional eating, overspending, over-working, over-giving and unhealthy behaviours and patterns are all signs and symptoms of an attempt to avoid pain, and to meet an unmet need.
Knowing what that is and freeing yourself from that can save you thousands of $$$ not to mention your health, your relationships and your happiness.
It’s time to get really clear.
To know exactly what’s going on for you and to know how to set yourself free.
With Love and Blessings,
If you are looking to dive deep into this, if you are so tired of attempting to control these patterns to no avail, then please book your call with me today.
It’s time to live into the joy, the truth, and the freedom of who you really are. Click the button below to book now!
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