What do you base your own worth on?
How do you measure it?
What is it that you believe that you need to do, be or have in order to be worthy?
Now before we dive into the rabbit hole with this one, I just want to share first of all, that our worthiness actually is never in question. We are always worthy right here, right now, regardless of who we are, what we’ve done or not done, and we can recognise, align with and know this, when we are living from love and from our heart.
We are already whole, worthy and complete just as we are now, and forever evolving and growing, just the same as a flower when it is a bud, is no less worthy of our love and appreciation, than when it’s a fully bloomed blossom.
It’s only when we are living from the ego/survival mind that this will even come up for you, as it’s when our perception is distorted through the lens of fear (the ego) that you will experience this.
But given so many of the women I meet, talk to and help are living from a place of stress, scarcity, survival and just trying to get through each day with a to do list that is a mile long, I wanted to share this with you.
As this might be something that is totally running your subconscious programming, without you even being aware of it.
Have you ever felt extremely agitated if you’ve felt you needed to get things done and others were taking up too much of your time, (or so you thought or felt.)
Have you ever felt almost an absolute obsession with needing things to be a certain way, and if they weren’t it induced immediate anxiety or strong feelings of stress, frustration or anger?
Things like leaving the house clean, ticking everything off the list each day, or needing to be a particular weight or body shape or size?
Have you ever felt so much resistance to doing something or not doing something, pressure from both sides, where you felt you had to, but you also didn’t want to, or maybe you were too exhausted to, but something inside of you just couldn’t seem to let it go? And you seriously had to “push or motivate” yourself to get it done?
Remember that 95% of what we do, our habits, beliefs and who we believe that we are is subconscious programming, that only leaves 5% of our conscious mind, to not only become aware of these programs, but to also overcome them. I’m not sure about you, but the math on that one is pretty clear to me.
And so much of the time, we have no idea that we are even running a program, until we can start to recognise the signs and symptoms of running the program – that is, feeling a particular old familiar emotion, or having a particular habit – getting angry or reactive, or emotional eating for example and the challenge with being in the program, is that when you are running it, you are consumed by it, and as Dr Joe Dispenza say’s it’s like being in a glass jar and not being able to read the label on the outside! Everyone else can see that you are in there and what you are doing, but we can’t read the label and sometimes we have no perception on it at all, until we elevate our state of mind, into a higher level of consciousness.
It does take wonderful effort, to overcome our old self and our old belief patterns. And you can’t change the programming through the analytical mind, the only way to change the programming is through the subconscious mind and that door of change, is accessed either from a theta (hypnotic brain wave state) or through our emotions that are equal to that feeling.
Awareness is great, but when we say to ourselves, I shouldn’t do that anymore, it doesn’t serve me, or it doesn’t feel good for me to beat myself up. It’s seriously like banging the outside of the computer, wondering why the programs in the hard drive inside the computer aren’t changing!
Then getting super frustrated and banging on the outside of the computer again and again, looping in more and more frustration and painful cycles, wondering why we aren’t changing, then blaming and beating up on ourselves!
I’ve been doing another deep dive for myself on hidden beliefs, that are running my programming, stopping me from feeling fully free, and inhibiting my feelings of worthiness. (There’s always new levels and layers!)
And after I uncovered these, I’m certain that so many other women would have these beliefs too, as we are kind of bombarded with these types of messages from society and generational beliefs from the day we were born. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not blaming society, it’s up to each of us, to become conscious of our thoughts and to take responsibility for our feelings and how we are choosing to live our life everyday.
But it is also about becoming more and more aware of what beliefs we have unknowingly absorbed from mass consciousness thinking.
When I pulled these beliefs out today, the relief and relaxation in my body was palpable.
It’s super exhausting when we are running some of these programs.
The 3 beliefs that I released today are:
1. “My worth is based on how much I can do each day”
2. “My worth is based on how pretty and thin I am”
3. “My worth is based on how much I can help others”
Wow, these were all so toxic and restrictive in my system.
If you’ve ever had the feeling that you just can’t rest, that you just can’t stop, or that you start to feel bad or guilty if you do stop to nurture or care for yourself in any way I can promise you the first one will be playing out for you.
This one, had me in full fight/flight for days – and if I stopped, feelings of guilt, shame and unworthiness would arise. This is super painful, because the more we are driven by this belief, the more exhausted we become, which only creates more and more feelings of unworthiness and shame, more feelings of anxiety, because when we are exhausted, we tend not to be as productive or focused (no brainer there!)
But without doing all that we believe we need to, feelings of more unworthiness arise and the program can become even more and more heightened, I truly believe it’s this belief that is creating adrenal fatigue issues in so many people in our society.
Where we have lost the focus on health, quality time with family, nurturing our soul, stillness and being at peace inside.
The second belief, oh boy, I’ve had fun with that one over the years, until I was 32, that one ruled my life entirely – mainly from the underlying belief that “I was fat and ugly” the anxiety I felt anytime I seemed to be putting on weight, or if my clothes felt slightly tighter that day, would produce extreme agitation, irritation and anger within me and then the barrage of negative comments and how I would speak to myself in my own mind, was seriously horrible. I wouldn’t speak to anyone ever like that!
That belief had me beat myself into the best shape of my life back in 2013, and yet even though I looked the best I ever had, the anxiety and fear internally had risen to an all time high, because what if I couldn’t sustain it! Oh and the self hatred and loathing that followed, when I did put weight back on. Underlying all of that was feelings of deep shame and unworthiness and to be honest, I didn’t recognise all of that back then, it’s only now that I can see it all so much clearer.
Then the third one, oh my lordy, this again has played out in a gigantic scale in my life. Perhaps you recognise this one in you too. This is when we become an over-giver. Trying to give more, even if the person we are giving to, is totally ok, and actually doesn’t need us to. This is when we will recoil in hurt if we are not appreciated for giving (because we are actually seeking worthiness attached to the giving) This is when resentment plays out at its worst in relationships and where we may feel controlled, manipulated or pressured by others.
It’s where we continue to deflect compliments, brush things aside, or don’t allow ourself to receive, because at a deep level our worthiness is connected with giving not receiving, so we may even feel agitated, or angry if someone is trying to support us or give to us, or at the very least have a very hard time accepting it. I remembered how much I cried (with gratitude that they would actually want to help me – as I felt like such an inconvenience and not worthy of receiving that) when my brother and Dad happily helped me paint the gutters and fascia of one of my old home years ago. Sounds crazy I know!
It’s an incredibly unresourceful belief and for me, makes me withdraw into complete isolation in utter exhaustion, when I’m running this program and unaware of it.
I naturally love to give, however when it’s from this place it feels terrible. This is when really unhealthy co-dependent relationships will also play out, or you may have had your own version of being the door mat, like I allowed myself to be in the past.
All of these beliefs are nothing more than a thought or idea we’ve taken on in our younger years. And with awareness and the right tools, can be shifted very quickly.
If it’s a program you’ve ran for years, sometimes it can take a bit of time to rewire the system as the old neural pathways drop away and you create a new more resourceful way of being, however you’ll be able to set yourself free in the moment, that you notice that the program is playing out.
It’s so time that we liberated ourselves from the entrapment of these beliefs, that have us feeling less than whole and constantly trying to find ways to feel worthy.
It’s so time you step into the fullness of who you really are Gorgeous,
I know how painful and how challenging it can be to live with these beliefs,
And you absolutely have the power to set yourself free from them.
It’s time for you,
It’s time for your freedom,
It’s time to liberate yourself and your energy,
It’s time to feel worthy and enough,
It’s time to step into the greatest version of you,
It’s time to embrace all that you are,
It’s time to let go of restriction,
It’s time to let go of pain,
It’s time to liberate yourself completely,
To feel whole, worthy and complete,
And to totally and absolutely Love who you are!
With love, light and blessings,
Always in All Ways,
If you are not sure how to transform those inner belief, one of my favourite ways of doing that is through Byron Katie’s work http://www.thework.com
If you are super ready to take everything to the next level, to totally transform any feelings of unworthiness, to step into your greatness and truly be living from your heart, then I promise you won’t want to miss out on the Quantum Manifestation Retreat!!
Only 3 spots left, take a Quantum ride with me, to your new reality.
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If this is you, PM me for more details beautiful. Xox
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