Where there is self-love, there is endless happiness…
I came across this quote a few months ago, and I just love it and I couldn’t agree more.
As humans, we can be so, so, so hard on ourself.
Constantly feeling that we need to be doing more,
That we should be better in some way, shape, or form,
Or that we should be more successful, thinner, happier, more of
something!!
It comes from the deepest fear that we aren’t enough and one of the most powerful anecdotes I’ve found about this, is truly learning how to love and value ourself.
The daily art of appreciating and acknowledging ourself, is something that has not really been handed down.
We are taught to look to others for that validation, recognition, and praise and then wonder why we end up people pleasing or feeling so controlled or even easily manipulated by others.
It took me until I was 31, to realise I’d spent my whole life, seeking validation and approval from others.
Holding out my self-worth to them, and asking them for permission, to tell me I was enough…..
Some days I was up, because I received lovely feedback, and other days I would plummet if I didn’t receive the so-called love, validation, appreciation, or approval, that I felt I needed…..
I felt wildly out of control and to be honest, quite a victim at times, let alone anxious and insecure.
Learning how to truly love, value, validate, approve of, and appreciate myself has been life-changing, and has taken me years to get to the current level that I am at today.
I’m still a work in progress, but I find with awareness, making the conscious choice, being kind, supportive, and encouraging with myself and truly appreciating and like who I am at my core has been so instrumental to my well-being and happiness.
Not to mention the radical improvement in all my relationships.
And the extra flow of financial abundance, because I am no longer questioning my worth or deservingness.
Whatever we declare and decide and believe to be true, life will show us the reflection of those beliefs.
When we build a solid foundation of self-love, it allows us to have more courage to express our most authentic self, because in the fear of facing rejection, if someone doesn’t agree, or holds different values, we become our own safety net.
Learning how to re-parent my wounded inner child, that is terrified of rejection, or not pleasing others, and learning how to reassure her, let her know she’s ok and that I’ve got her, has completely changed my nervous system, in a very positive way.
Writing down Three things, that I like love, and appreciate about myself each day, has truly helped this process.
Speaking to myself, as I would my daughters or best friend, has also made a huge difference.
And acknowledging and celebrating all the TINY and BIG achievements, or even seemingly inconsequential changes I’ve made along the way that have helped me progress in the smallest of steps has been a powerful shift.
We are so quick to look at what we didn’t get done, instead of truly acknowledging what we did get done.
Just for today,
Take time to acknowledge yourself,
Take time to appreciate all that you do in a day,
Take time to validate yourself with gentle words of praise, encouragement, and love,
Take time to do something kind for yourself, this might be saying no, setting a boundary, creating time to do something you love, or even resting.
Step by step, as you gently acknowledge the true gift of who you really are,
The magnificence of your heart and the magic of your soul essence,
You may just find yourself,
Feeling a little lighter,
And
Smiling a little more.
With Love and Blessings,
Sal xx
Abundant Heart Coaching, 538A The Esplanade, Warners Bay NSW 2282, Australia
Email: admin@sallyholden.com.au
Phone: (+061) 428 316 546