The most loving thing you can ever do for someone else is, be kind to yourself.
All other paths, lead to resentment….
When we do things for others at the detriment of ourself and our wellbeing, in an unconscious attempt to get approval, and validation from others, it always will lead to long-term resentment.
That’s why you feel that flash of anger or tension in your chest or stomach, when you say yes, instead of what you really want to say….
Anyone that we value their approval first and foremost, above our own, we will eventually resent.
Why? Because we will abandon ourself again and again for their approval and validation.
This ends up feeling like being manipulated and guilt-tripped, it feels like being trapped and controlled and used.
What will free you from these situations?
Giving yourself approval, so you are not dependent on another’s.
This gives you autonomy and freedom.
This allows you to make the best decisions that you need for your own well-being and happiness.
This puts you back in the driver’s seat, to make the decisions that feel aligned, authentic, and true to yourself.
All other paths take you further and further from your authentic truth.
We have been taught to twist and contort ourself, to be what everyone else wants us to be.
We have been taught to be good little girls, to keep our mouths shut, and to not speak up.
We have been taught to be loving, no matter how someone else treats us, and that if we are mad or angry about what happened, we feel ashamed of ourself and our anger.
We have been taught to give until there is nothing left.
It is time to free yourself and your children from the madness. (They learn by watching us.)
Letting go of these patterns takes time, I’ve been a work in progress for 12 years…..
I continue to do the work to free myself from the beliefs and chains that have bound me to my good girl, pleaser persona.
Do I love to help people and contribute to make the world a better place?
Absolutely, I’m just no longer willing to do it at the cost of my health, my well-being, and my authenticity.
When it feels aligned to give, support, to share my knowledge in a way that will be valued, then I follow that calling.
My ego hates when I say no.
It threatens its very existence.
Because it is terrified of the consequences of god forbid, someone disliking me, or disapproving of me.
However, I can no longer twist and contort myself to be, what everyone else wants me to be.
That leads to a total loss of self and inexplicable grief, not to mention incredible exhaustion, burnout, and total withdrawal fromrelationships.
I’ve been there and lived it for far too many years.
Self-Love is the way out of this.
Self-Validation, Self-Acceptance, and Self-Approval are essential tools to carry with you on the path of life,
These give you the courage,
To live your authentic truth,
To follow your heart,
To Use your voice,
And to live from a place of deep unconditional love for yourself.
To do this, we need to let go of the beliefs that keep us chained and desperate for external validation and approval, trapped in fear, living from the ego survival mind.
“I’m not enough”
“I need their approval”
“I have to be perfect for everyone”
“I have to be there for everyone”
To learn a 3-5 min process that is a lifelong skill, to release these damaging beliefs, I will be teaching this in a FREE ONLINE 1 HOUR Event on Monday the 11th of April at 1pm.
This is a SKILL for LIFE that when applied and used regularly, will free you to live your most authentic life.
This is a SKILL we MUST teach our children, to free them from the generational trauma passed down.
I believe this is a SKILL we all need for life, I promise you it will be worth it.
Click here to join!
The event will be live streamed in this group.
Can’t wait to see you there,
With Love and Blessings,
Where are you diminishing yourself? Where have you let go of your dreams? Where have you not spoken up for yourself? Where have you allowed yourself to be the doormat? Where do you not yet feel fully free in your life? The people pleaser in me has some strong programming…. It takes so much conscious …
Continue reading “Do you feel you have to keep everyone happy?”
𝕊𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝕥𝕠𝕕𝕒𝕪….. Whatever is on your heart, Whatever it is that you want to do, be, have, Start today. Whatever you need to say, Whatever your voice needs to express, Start today. Whatever is your biggest dreams, Whatever changes you desire, Start today. Whatever needs to be healed, Whatever needs to be reconciled, Start today. …
Abundant Heart Coaching, 538A The Esplanade, Warners Bay NSW 2282, Australia
Phone: (+061) 428 316 546